Farley here,
I’ve finally trained my humans to understand my barks.
A deep growl followed by frantic, high pitched barks means: “There is a bear within 20 feet.” There is a lot of body language involved here too. Mostly, me putting my body between the humans and the bear, so the humans know which way to retreat.
Deep, in the throat, repeated barking means: “There is a bear in the area but not close.” I’m a herder by genetics, so…I herd them away to safety.
Howling, long barks mean: “There is an aggressive deer nearby.” My experience, a doe with a fawn can be cranky at the best of times. My front paws usually lift off the ground during this communication.
Cheery barks mean: “There is a deer, but a nice one nearby.”
Barking while running in a circle, repeatedly looking at my human, and wagging my tail means: “There is a squirrel, so let me go chase it.”
It’s exhausting teaching humans to understand my language, but since their sense of smell is lousy, they need to be warned if there is a creature in the neighbourhood.
After a strenuous session of teaching Kristina dog speak, we relax with a yoga class. I’m supposed to be doing the downward dog, but I’m just too tired.
Woof Woof.
Creative Story Editors 
Great job, Farley! Munson has many barks too (and very different from yours as all deer are dangerous. Squirrels are pretty dangerous too.) In fact, since it’s his instincts to guard, everything, so silly, I think the majority of his barks mean, “run. I’ve got this.” ha ha. No wonder I’m having so much trouble trying to figure him out. I’m always worried he has to go to the bathroom.
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Stacey, I can’t believe squirrels are dangerous. They are so little. There’s one here who talks to me all the time. I think he’s actually yelling at me to get away from his tree, and he stays just high enough so I can’t reach him, but I can spend hours guarding the tree. Maybe Munson knows you think he needs a nature break and uses that as a way to get outside to chase squirrels. Dogs are smart 🙂
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Hi Farley. I hear you! My pair have been trying to understand me for over two years now and, while I appreciate their efforts, and we have made progress …….. they are soooooooooooo slow!
The thing is their sense of smell is quite pathetic. They couldn’t smell an abandoned hamburger if it was on the other side of a hedgerow right next to them! How they have survived as long as us canines I have no idea. Probably because of us canines eh? Then there is body language!!!!
They barely understand their own body language let alone ours! I watch Colin sometimes as we approach some human idiot with their dog and just know straight away that this is going to be a difficult meeting, but Colin? He just smiles at everybody and is very polite until the idiot does something stupid. Then he pulls me away and mutters something about dog owners needing to pass a test before being allowed to have a dog. The next time, he does exactly the same!
They are also very inconsistent! If I bark at the door, they open it. If I bark at Colin when he is doing something, he says “Show me buddy” and I take him to refill my water bowl, or to show him something. My barking works pretty good until I bark because I want more treats…… then nothing! Go figure! It doesn’t make any sense at all. We meet people who I know have a pocket full of treats and who give me one. ONE! I wait for a few moments and then I bark simply because I want another one. What in doggy heaven’s name is wrong with that? Thx for the opportunity to rant a little Farley. Woof! Ray.
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Ray, you are soooooo funny. Kristina read your comment aloud to Matt this morning over coffee and they are both giggling away. I have the same problem with treats. I know where they are hidden, I stare at the cupboard, and Kristina says, “you’ve already had one today.” Like that enough. Ha. If only I could open the door…
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Being on a boat all that time didn’t give your humans much experience with your dog language. Other then “there is a boat” and “there is a fish”
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And don’t forget the dolphin, shark or turtle. I knew those too. Once I fell in when a shark was right beside the boat. Kristina’s rescued me with super-human strength, and I was out of the water in seconds.
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We sympathise, Farley, it’s hard work training these humans – no wonder you need a rest! Millie and Pearl xx
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Hi Minnie and Pearl, thanks for stopping by. I’m wagging my tail at you! From my napping spot of course.
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Hi Farley, great post on the meaning of barking..looks like I will have to listen to my not so little Soi Dog Puppy… Saang Chai and pay more attention, this human has a lot to learn haven’t I ?
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If you listen carefully Saang Chai will tell you secrets too.
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I’m sure he will …I can’t to discover more about the world and how he sees it 🙂
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